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13 comments | Friday, December 19, 2008

Okay, this is a first for me. I just had someone leave a comment on my blog this morning which was a bunch of quotes about gossip. This post was made anonymously. I deleted it. Why? Because it was ridiculous. This is my blog and I'll post what I want and delete what I want. This blog does not belong to the digi community but to me. If I want to discuss what a customer said to me, I'll do that. I didn't share the customers name. I didn't share anything beyond my frustration with people being inconsiderate and cruel when someone is in need or when someone lends a hand to someone who is in need. If you don't like my grab bag sale to help a friend, just don't buy it and if you don't like the idea of someone selling her store and sharing with consumers the reason why, don't buy her store and don't read about it.

Now the comment about the gossip quotes is back. Hi Jane! I'm going to leave them since you felt so strongly as to post them again. They are actually good quotes but they don't really apply to me as I was not gossiping. If I was gossiping I would have named names. The person whose comment on an invoice I was upset about was gossiping and even admitted as much when she indicated she has "yet to talk to another designer friend of mine who has seen this ad & thinks this isn't tacky." So the gossip quotes belong to her, not me. She discussed my friend's sale and financial situation with others. That is gossip.

But what really prompted me to post again is the last comment made by someone who chose to remain anonymous. Here you go, read it in bigger print---it is a rant worth larger print and color:

Well isn't it enough that I pay such high TAXES for these incompetant people to sit on welfare? Why should I dish out more of my hard earned money to these selfish people who rather than stop doing what they know isn't working(going to school while children starve)they just stick their hand out to all and everyone in anonymous web land, I bet not one cent of these so called charity gifts are being accounted to the welfare dept. Their are serious people in real need and people like you designers who don't register your fund raising schemes or acts of charity are just jokes ripping off the wonderful giving and loving digi community like myself and all the real giving charitable women in this world! Who put our money/time/effort into real legitimate and registered charity functions!So she put all her store on sale, many designers do the exact same thing for many different reasons, but I've yet to see one designer do it in such a tactless way as this, I'm sitting here reading that ad thinking sell your bloody computer, your cell phone and all your other crap before crying poor to me or just put "sale" without all the emotional crap on your product listing!I think your airing a private comment about a customer on your blog is "TACKY" and don't look now but you have turned this blog into a "smack blog"!! LOL I wonder what the anonymous comment you deleted said?! I bet it was the only real truthful thing said on this post!Royanna are you a responsible business owner? how you handled this situation is inappropriate. How dare you berate a customer in this way! I'd not be surprised that you have passed her name around to everyone in your store and forum, touting yourself as the most charitable woman around and how dare anyone question your motives on this "cause" after all haven't you had the best month in sales since using this "cause" to your financial and mutual benefit! Why don't you put your money where your mouth is and donate to this Laura all your month's taking and not just give lip service to it but show us some real receipts of you doing it? How much have you raised for her and how much has she taken in sales, real charity funraisers have this information available to the public, this so called "charity" case is a joke and illegal!Yes, there are laws to protect the everyday charitable person from being taken advantage of in this way and many real and more worthwhile fundraisers to participate in!Please display how much income this "charity case" is actually getting from all her various sources, redundancies from leaving job, Husbands income, welfare income, partnership for Devine's ownership shared income, church handouts and welfare and then allow us grownups the decision on whether she is really a worthy cause or not! Heck I bet she has more disposal income than the magority of your customers who spend at your store!I appaud that designer for having the courage to tell you what alot of your customers were thinking anyway!

To this comment and anonymous person, I say:

1. I only deleted one comment and it has now been reposted and will stay that way since there is a name attached to it. Perhaps you should consider putting your name next to your convictions and opinions since you seem to have some pretty strong opinions about me.
2. This is not a smack blog. If you or anyone else continues to post comments in an effort to spew nastiness, I'll just disable comments or delete them. This blog is not a forum for people to anonymously post opinons, whether I agree with those opinions or not. Go find a real smack blog if that is what you want to do.
3. My friend, who I chose to help with a donation of my sales from a grab bag, is not a welfare recipient. So she isn't cheating anyone and no one is hiding any sales from the welfare department. And this isn't a scam or scheme to pull the wool over the digi community's eyes. For goodness sake, this is a $6 grab bag!!! Seriously now, to say that"fund raising schemes or acts of charity are just jokes ripping off the wonderful giving and loving digi community like myself and all the real giving charitable women in this world!" is just too much for me. If you were a truly charitable and giving woman you wouldn't be posting such nasty things THAT ARE NOT TRUE about my friend. You have made her out to seem like a scheming woman on welfare ready to take money raised by me or herself just so she can go to a spa or shop at Nordstroms. She is trying to put food on the table, heat her home and put a few gifts under the tree for her children. There is nothing illegal going on here. There is no scheme. It is people like you who go and post things that aren't true that make people question the sincerity of others when they do something that is decent and honest or ask for help because they really need it. Shame on you!
4. Why are you asking Royanna (correct way to spell her name by the way) on my blog? This isn't Royanna's blog and she didn't ask me to post anything or sell anything to help out our mutual friend. She, like me, is a bit dumbfounded at how cruel so many people can be when someone is in need.
5. Quote from you: "I'd not be surprised that you have passed her name around to everyone in your store and forum, touting yourself as the most charitable woman around and how dare anyone question your motives on this "cause" after all haven't you had the best month in sales since using this "cause" to your financial and mutual benefit! Why don't you put your money where your mouth is and donate to this Laura all your month's taking and not just give lip service to it but show us some real receipts of you doing it?" I didn't share this customers name with anyone other than those who received a copy of the invoice on which she made her comment. That would be me, since she used a gift coupon in my store, Laura whose store she purchased despite having said she didn't agree with the whole idea behind the sale (hypocrisy perhaps?) and the store owners, Laura and Royanna. I passed around her name to NO ONE. I did not visit any forums or smack blogs and say "hey, guess what so and so said to me." That is not my style. Those fellow designers and customers who know me know that I am not like that and I would never do such a thing. Posting about it---about my frustration with the situation in general about lack of charity and compassion in the world today---on my blog is how I dealt with it. That is my style. And just so you know, I have just about donated all this month's sales to Laura as the products in that grab bag were what I planned on putting in my store this month. This has been my worst month for sales to date because I gave up my sales for a friend. So actually I consider it my best month in sales because she needed the money more than I did and the amount that I was able to raise for Laura is her business and my business, not yours. And if you think I'm going to share invoices to prove to you or anyone else how much I have raised for her with my grab bag sales, think again.
6. It is "Divine" Digital, not "Devine" Digital. Learn how to spell.

For those customers that came here for a freebie, I apologize for the drama. And if you are of the same opinion as this poster is, I really don't need or want to hear about it. The holidays are supposed to be a time of giving and caring and I feel like I am defending myself for being charged with the horrific crime of kindness and compassion.


There is a wonderful mythical law of nature that the three things we crave most in life -- happiness, freedom, and peace of mind -- are always attained by giving them to someone else.
~Peyton Conway March


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Continue to do as you do.. screw those that don't like it. As you said they don't have to read about it or buy anything to do with it. Thank you for all you do and the gifts you choose to give.

Terry including my name here so its not actually anonymous. :-)

5:49 PM

Blogger Patricia said...

I CAN"T believe some people! The world would so much better off if we followed the rule "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all"

8:06 PM

Anonymous ktjrdn said...

That sucks. I'm sorry some peopel have to be so nasty

9:14 PM

Blogger Kimberly said...

I think most people are basically good, but there are those who feel the need to inflict their dark, shriveled souls on those around them. Don't let their hatefulness get to you, the rest of us admire what you're doing.

9:29 PM

Blogger KrisG said...

Here's a short response: Luckily the majority of us don't feel the same way as she does! It's unbelievable to me that someone so miserable has to spread it around. I think what you did with the charity is FABULOUS!!!! This IS your blog and have every right to keep or delete or say as you wish.

9:47 PM

Blogger Donna Rafferty said...

As the designer of the grab bag, the money you earn from selling it is yours to do whatever you want.

I think it is a generous and wonderful thing for you to donate money to help a friend who is having trouble, especially this time of year.

If only everyone could have as big of a heart as you - how much holiday cheer and happiness we could spread! As in the story of the Grinch - by giving to others, our hearts really DO grow bigger!

Thank you for sharing the many freebies you have created. I wish for you and your family to have a joyous Christmas!


10:11 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think it is wonderful to help out a friend. These are the fruits of your labor so you can do whatever God inspires you to do with them. If more people did things to help others the world would be a better place for all of us.
Keep up the good work.

11:47 PM

Blogger Kari ~ Relocated Dixie Girl said...

It's your product, it's your store, it's your sale. you do with the proceeds as you see fit. if you want to go & throw the money in the air, that's your business! but that tacky person who felt the need to berate you for what you were doing (which is very admirable, BTW) didn't pass up that sale, did she?

12:08 AM

Blogger cheri said...

Thanks for all that you do! I enjoy your blog and your store. Really love your stain glass kit...I love windows, churches,and am an Episcopalian to boot! It is your blog and what you do is your business! Part of why we are here is to take care of each other! Merry Christmas!

12:53 AM

Blogger KylieM said...

I am still yet to understand why people come onto blogs and berate you! If someone doesnt like it, then dont read it, dont visit .. and just go away!

Dont worry hun, people like that arent worth the effort!

4:24 AM

Blogger just me....lynn said...


I know yours and Laura's hearts and I know that they both were in the right place and meant nothing more than to be giving and gracious. At this time of the year I think we all need to have more understanding and promote peace and tranquility not strife. May God bless you and your family and also Laura and her family with love, peace and tranquility this Christmas. Our God is a gracious and loving God and I think he expects us to be the same!!

Merry Christmas


8:52 AM

Anonymous Missy said...

The thing is if anyone has a differing opinion, they get pounced on and attacked for being supposedly "non-charitable". I think the way this was promoted was tacky, too. I'm a conservative thinker and I know there are a lot others out there who would agree with me on this, but since the liberals scream louder, they will shy away from posting for fear of retribution.
But I will say this: If you come with a hand out asking the public to help you, you have to be open to scrutiny from that public. I looked at Lala's blog. She has many things a lot of people do without... a vacation, a cell phone, store-bought costumes for her kids at Halloween, pets, schooling for her husband, etc. When people see someone asking for a handout (including Food Stamps and medical cards paid for by taxpayers) and having so much already while others struggle in silence, it can be frustrating. Hence the debate. Yes, it is a time of need for a lot of people, so we have to be a bit pickier about who we choose to give to. Flame on!

9:59 AM

Blogger Melissa Indiana Sweetheart said...

Keep on beliving and doing what is right...and be thankful you are not such a sour person!

2:13 AM


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